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Friday, September 11, 2009

SEARCHING FOR A FRIEND? - BEFRIEND A POTENTIAL SCHOOL SHOOTER AT YOUR CAMPUS!!






Before I go on, I want to take a survey, am I the only weird person when after I "sneeze" instead of saying "Bless You" to other people around me, I say "Bless Me".  I never understood why I should bless anybody after sneezing, na me sneeze so why should I be blessing another bagger? Shouldn't the people around me bless me? U guys feel me shey? Lwkm

Lol anywayz what I meant by "potential campus shooters" are those persons who like the "Virginia Tech Shooter"  always come depressed to class, those persons who walk with that aimless gaze in their eyes. Those persons who seem to always be angry everytime you look at them, those psychos out there who you come in contact with on a daily basis. Those mad beings who go home everyday planning to come to class the next day to dispatch most of us to our maker.

One might ask me, "why controversy do you want us to befriend these potential campus shooters"? Afterall, while would you go and put your hand inside fire when you know it's going to hurt you. I will tell you why, if you befriend such lonely souls you are making a shrewd investment in your life. Who exactly will "Potential shooter No 1" seek to warn first if he is planning to shoot up a class? Me of course. Who will "Potential Shooter No 2" seek to send a text to warning me not to come to class that morning? Or that afternoon? or that evening? ME! ME! ME!

The only drawback is that there might be an instance where "Potential Shooter 1" might decide that since you where the only person on earth to befriend him, he might decide that he wants you to accompany him to heaven/hell and your ass might be the first to get shot. That my friends is the one serious drawback I see in this shrewd and wise investment and as you well know, every investment carries it's risks.

As my good friend "Charizard" will say, "the man wey get head but no give head is not a gbaski individual" So use that head to make shrewd investments to guard your life..
Abi Chari? hehehe Lwkm..


By Controversy.

25 comments:

Lady X said...

LOOOL!!!
This is so true! You can't really tell if they are a potential shooter cuz they could just be emo!

Buttercup said...

LMAO..you need to be sent to a psych ward mehn..

Controversy said...

Lol Lady X
If they are just being emo, still stay some distance away from them. Before u chop bullet.

@ Buttercup
Lol just tryn 2 stay alive big sis lol

Tay-mee said...

Lmao..I dunno how to describe the way your mind works..lool.

OMG I hate saying bless you so I just don't say it at all. I just find it...weird.

What if potential shooter is on a suicide mission and wants to kill everyone around him? Best believe he will not be sharing details with you..lol

Jess C said...

LMAO @ the drawbacks esp and the perks of being friends with a potential shooter. They just want attention shame they kill themselves wen they get it and never get the chance to enjoy it!

~B~ said...

hahahaa!! LWKMD!

u have issues, this kind risk is not sexy at aaaallll, so if my plan doesn't work out, I'd die??! O_O No tainz, I'd rather duck nd run 4 cover when dude starts shooting, or better yet, use a dead person as a shield! lol!

Bubbles said...

LOL
Controversy wth? lol
yeahhh I'm always scared
because some yankee people are fucked up

Realist said...

LOL... You never lie. I always try to talk with the outcast, i see it as my work for society, i might have delayed the shooting...lol

Controversy said...

@ Tay mee.
Lol we definitely think alike, I mean why should we be telling them Bless you, they should be blessing us, we are the ones that just got done sneezing. Lol @ if said shooter is on a mission to kill everybody, then that would mean I don fall e hand like that.

@ Jess C.
Yep @ they get the attention they never got while they were alive, when they are dead, and they are not even there to enjoy it.

@ B
ahn ahn it is a worthy risk o, am sure if ur like me ur one of those ppl who like seatin @ the back of class. Please once "said shooter" walks inside the class, the back ppl are gonna be the first to die cus the bullets will be flying backwards hehe

@ Bubbles
Lol am just saying Bubbly Bubbles u gotta be aware of these things. Nobody wants to die a senseless death.

@ Realist
Lol first of all I like ur name, if I had not chosen controversy fasho I would have chosen realist lol. Good name
As for u delayin shootin lol, make sure u no chop bullet as u are in the process of actin as "delayer of shooting".

cerberus said...

Nothing do you.

TaioFierce Ameen said...

I ll always blessed mysef dint realize I was meant 2 say bless u nd ol d people av met tell me "Bless you" wen i sneeze...lol
I like d way u r tinkin bout d killer thing... lol i mite invest bt i ll al`ways xpect d risks in d biz world...lol

Controversy said...

@ Cerberus.
Lol nothing do me @ all.

@ TaioFierce
Lwkm @ u've always blessed yourself, haha wow. U are actually suppose to say bless you to other ppl, not bless yourself. But it's good you blessed yourself all this while.

miss.fab said...

Lol... did you know that saying "Bless you" after you sneeze is superstitious? Something about sneezing causes demons to come out of your mouth or so... Can't remember the specifics. I still say it though, reflex action I guess. Just felt like sharing, lol.

Also, lol at friending mass-shooters. Honestly some er... non-Black people are rather... strange!

~B~ said...

It's tru oh! LOL! Now that u put it dt way, e be lyk say this ur idea ko bad sha...or I could jst start seating at d nearest exit :D

Controversy said...

@ Miss Fab
lOl @ some non black people are really strange. Funny ish.
I have not heard of the superstitious belief when it comes to sneezing lol.
I hope it's not true sha.

@ B
Haha yes o, nearest exit or seat in the middle of the class. Where there'll be somebody in front, at your back and by your two sides. That way u have a body shield.

bountiee said...

...Na we cant really tell who is crazy out thurr..n trust they r alot of 'em

bountiee said...

...Na we cant really tell who is crazy out thurr..n trust they r alot of 'em

Original Mgbeke said...

I sneeze and bless myself too. LOL @ this post...you have a point.

Enoch said...

Oboy, take am easy oh. You know what they say about birds of the same feather. Don't go and befriend the type that others would see you with and try to befriend you to stay safe.

Controversy said...

@ Bountie.
Na true I talk o.

@ Original Mgbeke
Lol we are birds of the same feather. The feather from the birds make us sneeze hence we bless ourselves lol.

@ Enoch
Hahahah u have a point o. And the potential shooter might now realise that we are trying to enter into his good graces. tut tut tut

Chari said...

LMAO!!!! you are correct my broda!

nonny said...

I cannot quite recall the name, but a stand up comedian had a show about this...lol. He actually talked about psychos in the work place that he always befriends and gives candy to. He said when the psycho finally snaps and comes to work with a sawed of shot gun shooting from office to office, he's gonna stop at your office and say "thanks for the candy"
The question now remains: Will he shoot you after that?

Controversy said...

Lol @ will he shoot you after that..
That's good thinking lol.
There are always risks involved in these things.

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