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Wednesday, December 16, 2009

WOMEN ARE PROMISCUOUS part 1


I am tired of typing in english..na so so english every tme...i just typed a 7000 word seminar paper now...na so so grammer full there.....erm....so make we relate on my own personal level now. My warri friends don spoil me finish....na so so pidgin we dey blow every time....na so i go for one interview like that last week...the guy con ask me say.... "Hello, how are you"..... i no even think b4 i respond say....."I dey jare bros....body dey inside cloth"....hahaha...then i con sodji say omo i don fuck up....ahaha...u know me now i am never stuck....i just laugh turn am into joke say i thought he was going to interview me in my native language.....na the reason why i talk am to remind am....haha....u know oyinbo now...always trying to seem interested in everything...lmao....he was like yea.....i would if u teach me.....una no go believe say the whole interview i just dey teach pidgin....hahaha....oh well...i sha got what i wanted from the interview...lol


Anyways back to the main issue....girls are promiscuous....Na wa for u girls o...walahi!!.ok wait first... how many of una agree with me?....anyways, i really no need una opinion....una fit keep am to una sef...i don yarn my own and na so e go dey......cuz wetin my eyes don see...my mouth no fit talk am finish...... ok ok...to start with....i go tell una this small 'tory....There was this girl i been dey talk to before i commot go naija last summer....we were really cool and all....anyways.....me i don get to a stage in my life wey be say i no too dey serious with girls...me i just dey freestyle...lol..The day i go dey serious na the day i discover say i don impregnate the woman i marry and she born pikin and the pikin con resemble me....ah!...i go submit finally....hahaha...so yea the babe is very fine sha.....na the same church we dey go.....i don dey scope this girl for some time......u kno na,...me i just decided to try my luck sha and everything just Jell like that sha....i swear e just be like say i hit jackpot...as i dey throw am to her side...she too just dey grab am sharp sharp......ah!...ok ooo....very good....so one day she con talk say the play play wey we don do don reach make we start to dey date officially.......hahaha....well...me i con think say...hmmm....fine girl....and me i be free agent......Nothing do me now...na so e start sha...


so around Mid May...i had to travel to naija for about 4 months......so me i reach naija now....i don dey grove......so i think it was around late June na so this other girl from my church call me say....hmmm...guy...when last u hear from ur woman...me i was like i think last week ooo...lol..she con talk say....hmmm..if u sabi wetin ur girl dey do....say..the girl dey Swansea(wales) at the moment and wetin she dey do i no go dey proud of am....me i no still believe....i con ask am say....madam how u take sabi all these.....she tell me say she get cousin for swansea....say her cousin post one picture on facebook wey my girl dey inside she con call am say where she sabi the babe...na so her cousin gist am...me i still no believe...i just talk for my mind say...hmmm bad belle commot for road...hahaha....well...so about a week later Jay(not his real name) con call me...Jay na my OOOOLD friend.....very very good friend oo..... we went to the same primary schoool...so we don sabi each other since we were little....so Jay call me say AH!....ol boy i don step on ur toes o....the guy just dey apologize say he no sabi.....say shebi i sabi say e no fit do anything wey go vex me intentionally......Ah!....me i was like guy calm down....wetin happen....he talk say abeg just forgive me.....i was like ol boy wetin na.....na so he drop am say dem just yarn am now say the girl wey he don dey nyash for the past two weeks na my woman.....


hahaha......if u see the way i laugh.....the guy sef first confuse.....i con tell am say ol boy enjoy urself jare nothing do u......e talk say e make videos sef..different days with different positions...he con send am to me.....if u see how this boy handle my babe...chai....Throwey one leg towards Afghanistan.....con hang the second one for him shoulder like turkey wey dem wan roast.....hahaha.....so anyways.....me i tell am say make he no tell the girl say he sabi me...so me i try to call the girl....Me i save the videos con edit am well...make am into something like a movie...put am on top DVD i con keep am....her phone no dey go through again....she don also commot me from her facebook,....hahaha....i was like ah!...ok ooo so me i no call again.....the grove for naija sef no dey make me remember say i get one girl somewhere...so about two months ago when i got back to england.....chai!....see how this girl vex for me...say me i abandon am.....hahaha.....she vex ooo.....con dey cry on top...say shey na because me i sabi say she love me na why i dey treat am like that.....hahaha...for my mind i don dey summarsault with laughter....hahahaha....so anyways.....me i beg am say make she no vex.....on top oo...she use me do shakara again ooo...hahaha....Now for her mind Na me be the dumbest Mugu in the entire universe....hahaha......and i actually enjoy playing the dumb mugu.


So wetin i wan do now???.....i have invited a couple of our friends over for movies on Christmas day...i tell them say make them con join me and my girlfriend make we watch movies on christmas day oo....she go cook...after we chop finish...we go con watch movie...i swear we go watch movie that day ooo.....hahahahaha.......anyways....This is just the first part...More stories are coming.....WOMAN ARE VERY PROMISCUOUS

38 comments:

Azazel said...

Lmao hahahahhaahahahhahaha i swear na serious movie una go watch that day. NO BE SMALL!!! I swear i would pay money to see the look on her face..Serious money.

Bubbles said...

sigh!
I could barely read this
I am not the biggest fan of Pidgin

I'm going to try and read this again
x

Bubbles said...

OMG!!!!
my mouth is like open!

Jay made a video?!!
omgosh!
wow too much!

ok not all girls are like that!

CerebrallyBusy said...

goodness, so much pidgin, took me like 30 minutes to read all that!

but LMAO u people go watch film looool

Azazel said...

Looooooool this ish is killin me with laughter

Realist said...

Hahahahahahahahha!! The girl sef be mugu, how go let someone tape you when you dey cheat.

Good Job man

Yinkuslolo said...

so, i have the skill to read pidgin. i read it in like 3 mins lol. funny mehn.

kome and finish the torii oh. hahaha

Otunba 'JesusFreak' Jb-M said...

@ yinkuslolo.....lol.....haha...dont worry....i will finish it on my blog post on boxing day....

@ bubble good u could read it at last

cici said...

lmao I really do enjoy the pigin good job...plz can I beg u plz don't show that video to all ur friends now...thats a total disgrace...plzzzzzzzzz as a woman I'm begging u....wetin be my own abi? lol

Myne Whitman said...

Where is the part two, and you try with the broken as they say, well done. You guys are too funny oo. LOL

The- Damsel said...

hahah LMAO!! i like when posts are writen in pidgin i dont use it much in my posts but its nice to read...haa but ur really showin this grl pepper oh...after she don watch that movie finish ihn eye go clear... not all girls are like that...she obviously has a character/self esteem issue.. BIG TIME!! lmbao!!

EDJ said...

First, I tried to read this but my eyes kept crossing with all the pidgin. I kept waiting for the part where the pidgin would end but it just kept going. It took me about 3 times longer than normal to read this post. Please don't ever write in pidgin again. Now, I have a headache.

Second, the girl in question is a complete dumba** but so is the idiot who taped it. In fact, anyone who makes a sex tape is a complete dumba**. What kind of vanity leads a person to tape themselves having sex? Do they really think they are THAT great? If you wanna watch people having sex that is what the good Lord made porn for. Sex tapes are pointless.

Third, women are promiscuous. So, are men. People are promiscuous. I am sure every female here has at least 5 stories of men being promiscuous so...

@Azazel I see how it is. Why didn't you accuse HIM of generalization? When I wrote my Man = Water, Woman = Clay post didn't you say I was generalizing? What is this? See your life?

Azazel said...

Looooooooool hahahah EDJ i swear to u I was actually thinkin about that when I saw the post..
But I mentally in my brain added "Some" to the title of the post which came out to SOME WOMEN ARE PROMISCUOUS.. No fight me o.

Otunba 'JesusFreak' Jb-M said...

lol.....@ EDJ...relax mehn...all women have the potentials to be promiscuous even if they dont av the liver to show it


@ Cici....if i dont show it then my christmas day has been ruined...lol


@ Mayne whitman.....part two is on boxing day


@ the damsel...u sef u kno....wetin pain me pass be say she....she don think say i be her mumu...haha...she think say she don get my remote control....we go see na

honey91 said...

OMG!!!!!
why is everyone messing up babes these days ahn ahn...
first one chic wrote about her roomate's fuck up, now u....

Azazel said...

Lol Dufalicious fuck up lol

leggy said...

ha ha.mehn i wont lie, i enjoyed this.
after that story i dont even have the mouth to argue about the promiscuity.

Azazel said...

Lol @ leggy

BLASPHEMY said...

LAFF WAN USE FORCE KILL ME HERE O !!!!!!!, this is good, o boy nothing do u, me sef i fit relate to dis kin tory but my own be say no body do video lol

Rene said...

my were burning when I was reading this, i prefer to listen to pidgin than read it......chai!
Back to the post, I agree with you that women may be promiscuous but it's not all sha. Anyways yarn the full tory after u open her yansh buh nt in front of everyone naw....maybe just a few. U know u're also opening Jay's biz so ask 4 his permission...buh I wonder how u'll get it
When I was still thinking that having a naked picture of one is stupid...sex tape is jsut off the chart....not on scale

Azazel said...

Lmao blasphemy na the same thing here o my broda. Rene lol she shouldn't have sought to treat him like mugu

Nita said...

Damn?! All that pidgin, longest time to read the post mehn. Anywayz , shey that girl don mugufy herself for mugurity hall of fame, Seriously why make a video about her sexcapades? Chai. But not all girls are promiscous o.

Midun said...

LWKMD!!!!! looooooooool!!
As from now on please give all posts a pidgin twist i can't stop laughing. The babe is going to have one hell of a christmas. I cant even feel bad for her.See confidence..... Her Mugu don find correct competition. LMAO!!!

Otunba 'JesusFreak' Jb-M said...

@ Honey...girls dey mess up these days...


@ Leggy....lol...u sef u know


@ Blasphemy...softly softly....no make laugh kill u...lol



@ Rene....its better when everyone is there...especially her female friends...i know they have all been discussing..they think i am a big mugu...that will send a clear message to all of them....i think i invited her sister sef....hmm..i dont think so...i will send the sis a text message now....that her cute sister that is always flirting wiv me...im sure she will jump at the opportunity to come for a movie at my place....lol


@ Nita....it was the dude that recorded it...and his face didnt really show.....he recorded it with a camcoder so it was really clear....and with my supper editing it came out really good....i even put effects....I will consider posting the video here sef.....But i will have to thoroughly think about it first...lol...so i am not promising anything...lol


hahaha @ Midun....walahi...na serious competition ooo

Azazel said...

Lmao @ her mugu done find serious competition..

Lol @ nita..
Serious mugurity in high places

Sugarking said...

Omo, U sef strong o! So u fit get mind look another man dey nak ur babe?? That'ld scar my mind for life!

Enoch said...

laughing my a$$ off.
Otunba. I've got a friend with a penchant for making videos with other peoples girlfriends. He's got quite a collection of 'trophies'

Tell us how the screening goes.

Azazel said...

Lol sugar king lmao am sure otunba for don dey cheat to for naija lol

Enoch forreal mehn.

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UnderCover07 said...

Pls continue to write in pidgin...life for dis obodo oyinbo na so so spro spro person dey write n speak...e don tire me.

But mehn hmmmm, I no even get hw I wan tke cover up for d babe or help restore her rep...she jst use her left hand fall her right hand for public.

Meanwhyl Oga Azazel dis tori sweet u die...lol

Realist said...

omo please post the video here, if you do not want to, holla at me i am your friend on facebook...lol

And please tell the Emole boy to change his music playlist on the site that thing is killing me softly

Nice Anon said...

"Some" women are that way. Let's just put it that way. It really does break my heart when I hear that women are cheating. In my mind, it is something only men are supposed to do. I guess I am a sexist when it comes to that.

Case in point, there is this random girl I know and i just found out that she has been cheating with different guys. I felt so baad! because first I thought she was responsible. Another is her fiancé is such a responsible guy that I admire. he works so hard and it just breaks my heart that she's doing that to him. I don't know sha. What goes around comes around!!!

Neo said...

read the pidgin in seconds *yay for me*

the girl messed up real bad sha, but in defence of my kind, we aint all like that, me for instance.

anyways the "premiere" of the movie in front of ur friends is just evil! Pls now, give her a private screening.

Otunba 'JesusFreak' Jb-M said...

@ Realist...u re on my friends list?...hmmm....anyways i really dont know who is who on this blog....lol


I know oo..i considered giving her a private screening but then it will not satisfy my evil desires.....like i am so looking forward to this

Tosin said...

wow, The pidgin was a bit much. Took me a good 10 minutes to understand what you were saying.

Azazel said...

Hmm @ Realist.

Anonymous said...

Lol me I love the pidgin sha very interesting wow... the girl is a bloody fool. I hope u disgrace the hell outta her.. na serious movie pls update wiv part 2 i wan laff be that!!

Anonymous said...

Im with NiceAnon I like to think that only men cheat lol... but it is a lot of females that cheat these days. Ex: one of my friend was asking about one guy like that ooh I asked her yh i know him why? She said they did some fooling around. Me as the kinda person i am i quickly scolded her. I said but the guy has a gf why are ur eyes there? She come say ehn wetin concern me and the girl?? I was ever so shocked sha.