SPITTING PASTORAL GAME: A PLAY!

Edit - Your boy Azazel is up for two awards again on the 'Nigerian Blog Awards". I was nominated for "Best Moniker" and "Most Controversial Blogger". Voting begins on July 5th, so get ready to do some serious voting. Now back to the blogpost.


Pastors, pastors, pastors. To be a pastor isn't easy; one must put forth a consistent performance every week keeping the congregation tuned in. One must be smart, articulate and knowledgeable (at least have knowledge of the Bible), and a little manipulative. Those successful in this art become highly influential, famous and rich. Examples aren't hard to find: T.D Jakes, Joel Osteen, Chris Oyakhilome, etc. These men of God become little gods themselves, having a rockstar type life- except for the ladies, drugs and booze. But lately I've been thinking, a man of position is capable of being a big time pimp. Remember the prerequisites I stated earlier? Articulate and a little manipulative. Now, imagine if the pastor uses those skills to pull females. Think about how lethally magnetizing this pastor would be. Also lately, I've been in my Hollywood-state-of-mind, so I decided to write a fictional play-like piece for you to visualize my point:

After a faithfully Tuesday, the pastor approaches one of his church members who is in the library and draws her to a private corner. She's a pretty 5'5 even toned skin, nice volumptous breasts, well sufficient backed 22 year old babe. He has been scoping this babe for a while, knows she was going to be in the library and now is his perfect opportunity to harvest what God has sown for him. As he pulls her to a corner, he quickly looks around to make sure no one is near and then he proceeds:

PASTOR: (clears throat) Halleluyarr sister, I want to preach to you directly. You see the Lord has placed you here with me for a reason. He wants me to convey a message for you and you alone. Amen?
GIRL: Amen.
PASTOR: See the Lord has shaped you to be a beautiful woman, the book of Song of Songs Chapter 4, verse 1 says; 'How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh how beautiful......'
GIRL: (smiles almost out of control with the amount of flattery she is receiving).
PASTOR:(continues)....Then later on in that same chapter in verse 5, it says, "Your two breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies.' Hallelujarr!! God wants you to know that He shaped those very breasts and molded that beautiful face just to glorify His name. Look at your breasts and say 'My breasts will glorify Your name oh Lord.'
GIRL: (looks at her breasts) My breasts will glorify Your name oh Lord.
PASTOR: The Lord also wants me to tell you about the parable of the talents in Matthews, chapter 25, verses 14-30. (pulls out his pocket Bible) I shall read:
'For it is like a man going on a journey, who summoned his slaves and entrusted his property to them. To one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. The one who had received five talents went off right away and put his money to work and gained five more. In the same way, the one who had two gained two more. But the one who had received one talent went out and dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money in it. After a long time, the master of those slaves came and settled his accounts with them. The one who had received the five talents came and brought five more, saying, ‘Sir, you entrusted me with five talents. See, I have gained five more.’ His master answered, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave! You have been faithful in a few things. I will put you in charge of many things. Enter into the joy of your master.’ The one with the two talents also came and said, ‘Sir, you entrusted two talents to me. See, I have gained two more.’ His master answered, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave! You have been faithful with a few things. I will put you in charge of many things. Enter into the joy of your master.’ Then the one who had received the one talent came and said, ‘Sir, I knew that you were a hard man, harvesting where you did not sow, and gathering where you did not scatter seed, so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. See, you have what is yours.’ But his master answered, ‘Evil and lazy slave! So you knew that I harvest where I didn’t sow and gather where I didn’t scatter? Then you should have deposited my money with the bankers, and on my return I would have received my money back with interest! Therefore take the talent from him and give it to the one who has ten. For the one who has will be given more, and he will have more than enough. But the one who does not have, even what he has will be taken from him.' Amen?
GIRL: (attentively listening) Amen.
PASTOR: The moral of the story is for us not to waste our talents and gifts. They are not decorations, they're not trophies. They are tools for us to utilize and glorify with. Now looking at you, I can see the Lord has given you many gifts. You have being blessed with a beautiful face and a feminine body. What have you done to utilize these gifts?
GIRL: (with a thinking look on her face and then looks to the heavens) Well, Thank you God for the gifts you've given me.
PASTOR: (unsatisfied look on his face) Well that is a good first step, but sister God is going to require more from you than just a flamesy 'thank you God.' Thanking God wasn't how the slave with five talents got ten, the Bible says he 'put his money to work and gained five more.' Sister you have to put your gifts to work in order to receive more gifts.
GIRL: So how do I put it to work pastor?
PASTOR: The question isn't how, it's where. The Lord our God has told me that He needs me to take you into the House of God immediately to show you how.
GIRL: So you want me to follow to church.
PASTOR: No sister, it's Tuesday our church doors are closed. But, because I am a Man of God, my body is the body of Christ, my lips are the lips of God, my heart is the heart of God, my mind is the mind of God, so therefore my house is The House of God. Amen?
GIRL: (feeling a little reluctant now) Amen.
PASTOR: (Senses the reluctance) Are you ashamed of something? The Bible says "If anyone is ashamed of me and my message, the Son of Man will be ashamed of that person when he returns in his glory." (rhetorically asks) So do you want the Lord to be ashamed of you when He returns? Then let's go before the Lord takes away your talent and gives it to someone who utilizes it like He did in Matthew 25:28-29.
THEY BOTH LEAVE.

SCENE TWO (PASTOR'S HOUSE)
GIRL: Ok so we are here, how does God want me to glorify Him?
PASTOR: The Bible says "There are many rooms in my Father's house." Allow me to show you the room He has prepared for you sister. (gently holds her hand and guides her to the master bedroom).
PASTOR: (still holding her hand, and now has his eyes closed shut) Halleluyarr, I hear God speaking to me now. He wants us to be naked infront of Him like Adam and Eve.
GIRL: (slightly angered) WHAT?
PASTOR: You are on holy ground, do not question your Lord thy God. Do so or face God's wrath for the disobedient.
GIRL: I don't feel comfortable with this.
PASTOR: You don't feel comfortable with what?
GIRL: Being naked around you.
PASTOR: Not to worry my darling, I'm not just any ordinary boy. I am a Man of God, therefore these eyes are the eyes of God. And being naked before the Lord is way of showing our innocence. Trust me, the Lord is on our side.
GIRL: (reluctantly undresses) Ok
PASTOR: (Opens eyes and is amazed at what he sees) Jesus is Lord!
GIRL: Now what?
PASTOR: Let's pray and find out.
GIRL: (closes her eyes).
PASTOR: Father Lord, you have spoken to me for a reason, you have placed us both at the same location for a reason, you have given me specific scriptural passages for a reason and have led us here in your house for a reason Oh Lord. Tell us how you want this beautiful girl to glorify your name oh Lord, in Jesus' name.
GIRL: Amen.
(pause)
PASTOR: Lord Jesus! What you ask of me I cannot do!
GIRL: (curiously perplexed) What is it?
PASTOR: The Lord wants us to make love in this holy site.
GIRL: What?!
PASTOR: Do not be alarmed my dear, for the Lord sometimes requests for things of this manner. The Lord told Abraham to kill his only son, and Abraham attempted to and when the Lord saw his heart he stopped Abraham and blessed him infinitely. In times like this one must be very obedient.
GIRL: This is crazy.
PASTOR: The Lord works in mysterious ways sister. Now please let us proceed before the Lord angers
GIRL: (reluctanly gets in bed and positions herself)
PASTOR: (happily follows).
(Curtain closes)

THE END

Any party depicted in this fictional work is absolutely co-incidental. Therefore this is only fictional satire, so laugh and/or think. Peace.

THE ACCUMULATION OF MY FACADES

Panegyric reform of this maniac morphed into a resemblance, an imposter of who I wanted to be. Cuddling with the devil and dancing with vampires in a melody only he could hear in his head. I took sleep from him and sucked the life off his lips. Quickly becoming the fuse to the pressure under which he felt indebted to submit. Raving like a mad man, emotions made him tremor, sending him into a state of mind dehydration. Deprivation and deceit was all I offered, nonetheless, the dish was presentable, and often came on a platter placed in between my thighs

Suicidal and submissive, he fell to my feet as I dug my fangs deep in his temple, he begged for more….confused. Ostracized from his own life, he was now a slave to all the inflictions of Maxwell, Ayo, Gbenga and Acheve…he paid for Jason, Mo, and even cousin’s torture. I felt no remorse and I drilled a nail on his palm as though he was bearing the pain for their sins. The eerie ambiance that surrounded my satin sheets made his hairs pay closer attention, voluntarily submitting himself to sadism, slow and subtle death lurked.

Don’t worry about me, I had my cyanide in the forms of muscular six footers with penises that left imprints in dust. When I’m done, history will never come full cycle, spoken of for centuries to come, yet in that chapter marked “anonymous,” the biggest lesson will be embedded. Lines rippled across my forehead as his need began to surpass my desire to further inflict. Rhythmic vibrations sent chills down my spine, sadly…I only wanted solitude after the earth shaking, mind blowing performances as he held on as though his life source was in between my light source and wrapped tobacco. These creatures lust after snob, thirst for attention from the “could care less-es” and danced to the offbeat of the tempo-less. Applauding my ignorance and exalting my blunder, it is time for an exchange.

Deciding to proceed in this quest for a scapegoat count, I began to realize the exceptional resemblance…I had morphed into a resemblance, an imposter of Maxwell, who exhibited attitudes similar to that of Ayo, with a hint of Jason’s archaic sense of humor. I had quickly become a carelessly packaged simulation of sheer awkwardness, a collage of “in your face fuck-it-ness.” These actions only created and reproduced more dummy hearts, wickedness correlated. I had become Lucifer’s bride personified, Jezebel, Delilah and Hitler (if he has a vagina)…I had birthed cold heartedness and breathed it into the unknowns…I had conformed. Light rays submerge, darkness falls out of slumber, accompanied by my silhouette, I walked out of the shadows, into an army of imposters, zombie like and in sync, I realized…………….these faces looked familiar...these faces were me.

IS GOD ALLOWED TO CHANGE HIS MIND???

Seems like my blog mojo is coming back to me, because I've been M.I.A for a cool minute. The post today is about whether God is ALLOWED to change his mind. First for God to be allowed to change his mind, I must first prove that he is capable of changing his mind. Please before I continue, this post may be confusing to some who don't read their bible on the regular. You know yourselves lol.
In 1 Samuel 15:29 
It says "And also the God of Israel will not lie or change his mind; for He is not a man that he should change his mind". This verse states that God can not change his mind because he is not man. 
I will then show you all an instance in the bible where God did change his mind. In Isaiah 38, God changes his mind about killing Hezekiah. He first says Hezekiah is going to die, and then after he saves him from dying
" In those days Hezekiah became ill and was at the point of death. The prophet Isaiah son of Amoz went to him and said, "This is what the LORD says: Put your house in order, because you are going to die; you will not recover."
Then in verse 4 God says this - "⁴ Then the word of the LORD came to Isaiah: ⁵ "Go and tell Hezekiah, 'This is what the LORD, the God of your father David, says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will add fifteen years to your life."


This is not the first instance in the bible where God has demonstrated a propensity to change his mind, he also changed his mind concerning the people of Israel in Exodus 32:14. 
"So the Lord changed his mind about the harm which he said He would do to his people". 
Now most of you are probably wondering what my point is, so what if God changed his mind? Am not even trying to say there is anything wrong with it. This post came to my mind as I was reading my Koran, on the back of my Koran it said "The Quran is a complete and original compilation of the Final Revelation from God to mankind through the last Prophet, Muhammad, Peace be upon Him." It also makes a reference to both Abraham, Moses, David and Jesus as being prior prophets/people God revealed stuff to 


What drew my mind to that statement was the fact where it referred to Muhammad as the 'LAST' prophet. Now most people would read that and not probably pick up on that word "LAST". It didn't mean there wouldn't be other men of God like pastors/imams etc, rather it referred to Mohammed as the last prophet God revealed anything to vis a vis - Holy Book. The Torah is a Holy Book, Bible is a Holy Book, Quran is a Holy book also. It was saying that Mohammed in my opinion is the last prophet God revealed a Holy Book to? Idk if you guys get my meaning.


Anyhoo, I had always wondered, lets say God decided to 'inspire' people to write another Holy Book would people take that book as being a real Holy book on the level of the bible/koran? Because I feel that even christians and muslims would be skeptical if somebody came out with maybe a Third Testament of the bible? Or Second Testament of the Koran. The Koran passage stated that Mohammed was the last prophet, and am assuming that Allah/God told Mohammed that he would be the last prophet. My main question is this, since God has showed an ability to CHANGE HIS MIND, is it then not possible that he could change his mind about having Mohammed be the last prophet and send another prophet to us? And if that prophet were to then come, would we accept him? Or would we cast him out as a false prophet? Would pastors/Imams not proclaim such a prophet as being a false prophet? And would they be wrong for condemning said prophet? Afterall in their very own holy books it tells them that Mohammed was the last prophet?


For the christians reading, some of you will be like why am I grouping muslims and christians together. Well, I will now focus on the christians. Most of you believe that Christ is the last messiah abi? And the next time he comes it will be for him to come usher us into heaven and rapture and blah blah blah.. Am asking then, is it not possible for God to change his mind about the Jesus coming back a 2nd time plan. And send another person to come do some other work? And if such a person were to come, would we not use the same Holy Bible given to us by God to argue against the person sent from God? But even at that, the same bible has shown that God has a propensity to change his mind. 


I came across this quote, yall should check it out. Hopefully it makes sense to some of you. 
"Suppose, however, that God did give this law to the Jews, and did tell them that whenever a man preached a heresy, or proposed to worship any other God that they should kill him; and suppose that afterward this same God took upon himself flesh, and came to this very chosen people and taught a different religion, and that thereupon the Jews crucified him; I ask you, did he not reap exactly what he had sown? What right would this god have to complain of a crucifixion suffered in accordance with his own command?"

LIFE - A GIFT OR A CURSE?

The other day I got into a discussion with Ruggedman on Twitter about a statement he made about Life being a gift. So as to be fair and before somebody accuses me of slandering the good man's name I will post his tweets on here. Surely he will have no problem with that, afterall any man who can record the phone call conversation he had with another man (9ice) shouldn't have a problem with me using his tweets to make an point. *grins* Totally disagree with the way he handled that situation btw. 
Anyhoo, Ruggedman tweeted this  -  

"So in what ever u r doing right now,or the situation or condition u r in just pause n thank God for the gift of life."

I replied with this - @RuggedyBaba Life is not a gift to everybody o, just because it's a gift to u does not mean it's not a curse to somebody else.

And to qualify my reply to him, I sent him a Twitpic of this kid who was being stalked by the vulture and asked him whether he thought the kid in the picture considered life as a gift or as a curse?

My guy then tweeted back saying - @Azazel in which ever country dat is,they av a leader n its their responsibility to cater for their pple.It woulda been cool if u were in dat pic,helpin out

I replied his tweet with - @RuggedyBaba and wat is God's responsibility?Wen the leaders cannot fulfill their responsibility?Surely the almight shud not be a bystander

He replied with - He will nt come down to intervene.Question d leaders n nt God or me.RT@Azazel: @RuggedyBaba and wat is God's responsibility?Wen the leaders cannot fulfill their responsibility?Surely the almight shud not be a bystander

I then wondered why if God could not intervene to save a little boy about to die, why then do we bother praying at all. 

I replied - @RuggedyBaba if God will not come down 2 intervene why then do countless nigerian pastors pray 4 him 2 intervene 4 Nigeria's situation?

So I then asked him how he knew God could not come down to intervene he replied 

- I only responded out of courtesy.What exactly did u do to help d boys situation?RT @Azazel: @RuggedyBaba but u made a statement and I questioned the statement.Nd since wen did u become God's spokesperson on earth baba?U be pastor?

 He then replied with this - Since when did u become d spokesperson for d boy in d pic?n what gives u d right to question "my statement"RT @Azazel: @RuggedyBaba but u made a statement and I questioned the statement.Nd since wen did u become God's spokesperson on earth baba?U be pastor?

Anyways after this back and forth, the guy asked me what I had done to help the boy in the picture, obviously the boy in the picture already don die, go hell come back enter bus, come die again enter heaven. (Meaning the boy had been dead for a cool min). But I realised that when some people can't give u a satisfactory answer to a satisfactory question, they throw the question right back at you. Rugged now started asking me what I had done to help people who had suffered. Personally I believe that people who ask questions like that need to have their heads checked. Because u are  asking a person to be specific on how much money he/she has donated to a cause or what they have done to help suffering people across the world. 

I asked him whether he wanted me to tell him how much I had donated to the poor? Such questions are silly, because no matter what answer I gave my charitable efforts would be diminished by the person asking the question. Remember you can never give enough, so if I had told Ruggedman that I gave $25 every month to PLANUSA he could have asked me how come I didn't give $50? If I said I had donated all my life savings including my house he would ask me why I did not donate my BB.

I don't know if you guys get my point, but we sha went off on a tangent from the original question on whether Life was a gift or a curse.

I told him that I believed that Life could be a gift to others and could be a curse to some. Pretty Reasonable Yeah? What do u guys think?

And also was he right when he said that God could not intervene to save the little boy's life??? 

If you were God, would u save the kids life? If no, why?

GOD IS DEAD

How can I be a member of a blog and I rarely ever write posts? Nawa for me o


“God is dead.” Those words were uttered by Friedrich Nietzsche [exceptional fellow] sometime in the 19th century. Apparently, Friedrich was convinced he had stumbled upon an epiphany no one could deny. As far as he was concerned, the spread of science and enlightenment in Europe guaranteed God’s days were numbered. He believed this so much that he set out to devise a means of maintaining moral order in the absence of God. LOL.


Fast forward many many years to the present. Mr Nietzsche is dead and God apparently isn’t. Yes, there has been a clear decline in belief in God over the past century, but with Europe harboring believers in the healthy double digit percentage range and Africa in a conflagration for God; it's hard to make the case that God is in anyway desperate for some sort of life support.


On the one hand, I can see why the man thought the way he did. With the emergence of Darwin’s theories on evolution, advancements in astronomy and science in general, he was convinced that the truth will set us free. He probably believed that the natural consequence of such developments is an insurmountable burden on faith. I suspect he imagined that, in his time, one would need an unattainable size of faith to believe in tales of a talking snake convincing a grown woman [fashioned after a rib] to fail a test of obedience set by a God who drowns his own people in genocidal numbers. A God who, by the way, didn’t equip man with “the knowledge of good and evil” before going ahead to test man’s tendency to choose evil over good. A test posed as a onetime true/false exam, in the form of a fruit, and punishable by the death of all generations. What a fool Nietzsche was for having so much faith in common sense.


On the other hand; the guy underestimated God’s self preservation instincts, overstated man's capacity for radical ideological change and was just plain silly to put an expiration date on an idea. The sad irony is, for all his obsession with Darwin's work on evolutionary biology, and his own study of God morphing over time and across cultures, the man didn't count on God evolving to samba to the tune of the alleged death knell sounded by science. A dance that has grown in sophistication as God's followers edit, evermore rapidly, what they believe of him to suit their taste.

That one is a metaphor. This one, a translation error. Ignore that bit, that's just a reflection of their abhorrent cultural practices. No, that's just mans imperfection/prejudice sneaking into the word you can ignore it. Yup, It's the age of the personalized God. God 2.0. They may call themselves Christians/Muslims or Mormons, but within each group every individual worships a different customized version of God. This is very easy to verify, challenge any critical part of their books and the fevered editing takes off in every direction.

Maybe this unconscious breakup of the one God into a pantheon is indeed symptomatic of his demise. It is just possible that he is edited into oblivion, bit by bit, one fantastic tale after another. Perhaps that's what Friedrich foresaw? Chances are, he just got the obituary date wrong. Oh, how fulfilled he would be if he could witness this all too subtle slow death of God at the hands of God's own worshipers. Patricide of a divine variety. If he was a sadist, the pace might excite him.



Anyways, on to my question. As a believer, if you had the chance to speak with that clueless heretic, what would you tell Nietzsche is the basis of your faith?


PS: Please. This is about "belief in God" dying. It is not about God dying. It's a metaphor. That's how the phrase "God is dead" was originally used, and that's what this post is about. I didn't think I needed to spell it out, but judging from the number of comments I've received pointing out that "logical flaw," I should have included this PS from the start. I am however, amused to see that religious folks make the "belief is not equal to existence" connection easily.

SOLITUDE + DEATH + FRIENDS = ??

Before I go on with this post, I apologize for any generalizations I may make, any grammatical errors I may make because am in such a hurry to write down what am thinking, that I can't stop to make any corrections. My brain has been skipping in and out so my thoughts have been all over the place.  

So most of us in one time or the other have come across a person who we loved talking to or interacting with and then if your like me, you realised you did not want to get to attached to the  person lest you begin to seem like the one who was 'What is the word am looking for? What is that 'word' that u call somebody who always calls/texts more than the other person?' I think its 'Loser/Creeper/Stalker/infatuated' etc abi. 

Ok so most of my life, I've always prided myself in being able to walk away from anybody/anything whenever I chose. I convinced myself that nobody was that important to me, whether friend/family that I could not cut them out from my life when I so wished. Well obviously that was a lie, because there are somepeople who end up being more important to you that you wish. Anywayz, have you ever been in that situation where you realise that your the one who makes the effort more to communicate to somebody than the person makes to communicate to you? What is the typical human reaction? Most people cease communicating with that person until that person communicates back? Most of us have done it one time or the other. 

So there was this female friend of mine who I was close to, we were very good friends. One day for some reason, I started to think that 'Hmm I've been the person calling her lately, I wonder if am starting to become a nuisance. Maybe I should wait for her to call me, maybe then my worries will be appeased. Keep in mind, I and this friend had known each other for a good 2 years so such things should not have been worrying me. Well that day she was on her way back to school, and while I was there dulling myself and ignoring her even though she had texted me, my friend went and got into an accident and I think she fell into a coma or so. Now when I found out that she had gotten in a coma, there is nothing like the guilt that comes over you when you realise that somebody you cared about might die before you got the chance to even say goodbye or farewell. I had not texted her back because I was still there fronting with my stupid ass, well my friend is fine now, she came out from the coma and everything is all good. But when that incident happened, I vowed to never let my pride stop me from letting somebody I cared about know that I loved them and really appreciated the fact that I was in my life. It's funny the things you think about and vow to do when death is imminent. 

Anywayz, being the human that I am, as time went by I have always messed up on that vow. I always cease communicating with somepeople when I feel that am 'making an effort' to be the first to holla at them even though they also holla at me also. I have this other female friend who has sickle cell and she's always in and out of hospitals because of that. My friend can die at anytime and I am fully aware of that, it doesn't bother me as much. What bothers me is the fact that I let that 'pride thing' come in the way again, today I checked up on her and she was in the hospital again. I normally talk to her everyday whether it was through BB or twitter but for the past 3 days I had not talked to her, and I knew deep down even though I did not want to admit it that I was avoiding her. 

I realised today that she could be dead, and I would be there again dulling myself like the first time and she might already be on her way to the mortuary and I would not know. I hollered at her, and that's when she told me she had been at the hospital. Anywayz, this got me thinking, everytime I convince myself that 'pride' does not matter and that the 'friendship' is to important for such trifle things to still bother me. It still  manages to win over me after a period of time, like after 3 weeks of being a good friend I end up going to my 'Azazel against the world state of mind'.

 I mean to be honest, am a loner, I love being alone and I bask in my solitude. But what good is solitude if it makes me take for granted the people I truly care about? I like being alone with my thoughts for a long time, some of my friends misread that and think am avoiding them but if I don't get 'me' time I turn sour. When I tell people that Death is the only thing I can say without a doubt that I respect more than God, family and friends. It's the only thing more than can take away everything you've worked for, everyone you love and do it in such a manner that it is irreversible. And when it comes to my thoughts about death, I feel that it can be summed up by this quote by Mark Twain - "The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time". This quote explains how I live my life everyday and how I interact with people in my life.

I know this is a long ass post, if you did not understand the post. Am sorry for that, it's my blog and I can write whatever I want. *shrug*. To be honest, I wrote this blogpost for myself, so I could reflect more. Sometimes when I don't put my thoughts in writing, they end up being all over the place.

Is Your Baby Going To Hell?

Ya know the Catholic church has debated about this before. They couldn't find anywhere in the Bible where babies who haven't accepted Christ in their life go. Well according to John 3:5, no man (or/and I guess child too) may enter heaven without being born again, of water and spirit. That's why the Catholics baptize babies, but the problem is the "born of the spirit" part. Since the Catholics knew it was impossible for that to happen, they proposed a place where babies go to when they die; purgatory. Purgatory is like a spiritual version of Earth, as in it's neither hell or heaven. But just as the story of Mary ascending into heaven, purgatory isn't written anywhere in the original holy book. With that being said, I'll discard the idea of purgatory, but purgatory does raise another question: If purgatory doesn't exist where do dead babies go? Heaven or Hell?

Well, it's a complex question with a simple answer; Hell. Some will argue that God wouldn't do that to the innocent little kids. Ha! Yes He would. According to the Bible which God supposedly wrote, He has a track record of doing such acts. Remember, back in Moses's time when the Israelites where still slaves under Pharaoh? God ordered Pharaoh to release His people instantly, but the strong head said "na lie, I no go do am." So God said "Ehhn? You go hear wein, you just watch." And indeed Pharaoh and his subjects heard serious wein. First, God took his anger on the innocent fish who had nothing to do with these fucking humans, by turning their water to blood and killing them. Secondly, He released frogs all over Egypt and then lice and gnats. One would think by now Pharaoh would have heard enough wein, but Pharaoh wanted to hear more. So God gave him flies (now if the Egyptians were smart they would have used the frogs for pest control), and then added diseases, incurable boils, even hail mixed with fire! Still Pharaoh no gree, so God gave him locusts and darkness. But since Pharaoh kept his head strong, God decided to go for the low blow; He decided to kill every first born male in every Egyptian family. So instead of God to go after the guilty strong head directly, He punishes the innocent to send an indirect message to the guilty, na wa oh. So when people say "God is great" as they blow up buildings and kill innocent lives to send a message, this is the God they got that logic from. But if God could punish those innocent sons of Egypt for a crime their leader committed, imagine what else He can do. As a matter of fact, there isn't that much imagination you need to have, after the fall of Adam, God decided to punish his kids (allegedly me and you) for something Adam did (sin). So because of Adam, we are supposedly already born in sin, and that's something God hates. However, the only to reverse that is to accept Christ, and since babies are too innocent and ignorant to wrap their brains around the concept of sin and repentance, then according those rules, these babies deserve hell. Now some of you may naively say, "God is too merciful for that." Niggas/bitches please, was He merciful to the innocent
Egyptian boys? No? Exactly.

You know what's funny; it's when people who get unwanted pregnancies just feel like the baby can go to hell. Well, according to the Christian beliefs, the baby does exactly that. Talk about be careful what you wish huh?

Anways, it's been nice sharing my thoughts with thee, now it's time to say ciao, bye in Italiano (My Italian has improved ever since I started listening to the Italian rapper, Fabri Fibra, who I'm currently listening to, y'all should check him out on youtube). So in that case, ciao ci verdiamo dopo.

WHY MAKE A TREE WE DON'T NEED??

People, Azazel raised a question in his last post that got me perusing the pages of my Bible and the recesses of my mind, looking for understanding, for answers, for truth. Why would God create the tree of life in Eden if he had made man immortal? Why make a tree man does not need? One theory is that man was to live forever by eating from that tree periodically, and then when Adam sinned, God blocked their access to the tree, leading to Adams eventual death after 930 years. That seems likely, and may explain the reason why as generations went down from Eden onwards, lifespan decreased. The trees effects was being diluted as ages went by.

The question, however extends to the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Why make a tree he does not want man to eat from? There are so many answers to this question..at least in theory. But none of them have been satisfactory.

The age old answer has been: "God loved humans so he wanted them to have free will. He wanted them to love him by choice so he put the tree and told them not to eat it, as a test." but under the slightest bit of scrutiny that answer doesnt hold up. If it was a test of their love, he could have given them some task, maybe "run round the garden twice everyday" or something harder, and see if they love him enough to do it or he could have made the tree without any harmful effects and told them..."dont eat the fruit of this tree"
simple...and see if they obey. if they dont, his test is served. Its like testing my child's obedience by giving him a cup of cobra venom, and asking him...dont drink of this cup. No matter who deceives him into drinking it, am I not to blame for leaving him access to poison? Wouldnt it be better to put sprite in a cup and tell him "dont drink this". if he does, i know he doesnt care, but at least no one will be buyin a coffin. does it really prove how much i love my son if i give him death and ask him not to eat it.

As I put this up now, Im still looking for answers, so maybe yall can help. cos i cannot find justification anywhere for this kind mess. Im sure God knew what he was doing, but for the life of me, I cant figure out what it is. Unless he was just setting us up for failure. Which is quite plausible. I wont conclude shaa..until i hear from others. Peace...

CAN GOD LIE???

Before I start, THANKS A WHOLE LOT TO THOSE WHO VOTED FOR THIS BLOG @ the Nigerian Blog Awards.. On behalf of all the contributors on this blog, I say 'oshe'(Thank You)

The title of this blogpost probably made a lot of you cringe and internally say 'NO GOD CANNOT LIE'. I hope to examine that common belief that 'man is always wrong, and God is always right'. How many times have men of God told us that God told them to do something, and what they ended up doing became a failure or what God told them to do did not apply to our good senses? 

Take Chris Okotie, a pastor in Nigeria, during the last presidential election did he not state publicly that God wanted him to run for public office?? Now if God said he should run for public office, how come God did not ensure that he won the election? So did God lie or did Chris Okotie lie? Most of you are inclined to state that Chris Okotie lied, but why is that? 

Personally as I've stated time and time again, I do not think that God is infallible. I have no problem believing that if there was a God, he would be capable of lying. 

I remember when the pastor of the church I use to go to stated that God told him to open up a saturday night service at his church, and the whole congregation hailed him and everybody was happy. Six months later, he came back and said that the Saturday night service thing was not working out so he had decided to stop doing it. Now remember that 6 months earlier, God had supposedly given him the green light to go ahead with the service, so why would God give him the green light to go ahead with something that would end up as a failure??

Which brings us to my question again, who lied in this case? God?? or the pastor??

My favorite philosopher Thomas Paine once said "That God cannot lie, is no advantage to your argument, because it is no proof that priests can not, or that the Bible does not."

But then even that quote makes no sense to me, because if priests can lie? and the bible can lie? Why then do we even believe there's a God? Afterall we came to know about God and his characteristics through his prophets and through his 'bible'. So if the priests and the bible can be liars, then is it not possible that the idea of a single God could be a lie?

I just came off this 'heated' debate with Juiceegaal on twitter, ok ok it really wasn't that heated but basically juiceegaal was of the opinion that 'Asking questions is a good thing' and I agreed with her totally but I just had to do a little probing. Sometimes people think that the 'questioning' part should only be relegated to opinions or ideas not to people's personal lives as well. But I believe that the 'questioning' extends to every fiber of our human existence, I am perfectly fine if somebody asks you How many people you've slept with? Do you sleep naked at night? Have you smoked weed? etc, questions should not be relegated only to opinions or ideas that need to be challenged. They can extend into your personal life as well in my opinion and unless you have something to hide, you should not cringe when somebody probes into your life that deeply especially if your somebody who champions the 'need to ask questions'. 

James Allen once said "The man or woman who cannot endure to have their errors or shortcomings brought to the surface and made known, but tries to hide them, is unfit to walk the highway of truth..

If you can't bear to have aspects of your life questioned with respect, then you can like to get off the "highway of truth".

For whose eyes?

Soooo school has taken a break from kicking my ass so i can contribute to this glorious blog. I was having this discusion with fellow interns at my internship, well we were not at work we were chilling over some drinks, my drink was water. The question was do girls like it when guys look at them. One chic said she didnt like working out because of the way guys look at her. Me, as a workout addict, i was in the best position to answer this. I agreed because there is something about lifting weights that gets my eyes glued to a nice looking ass or boob or face or anything of the other gender...lol Then i remembered how girls always go out of their way to walk to and fro in front of me and my friends while we work out. This brought up my point, that girls love it when guys look. The girl swore up and down that she hates it... "i feel violated" blah blah.
One of the guys then ask her, what if no one looked at her, would she like it then? After moments of trying to lie to herself, she admitted that she wont like it.


Personally i feel they love it when guys look at them. Personally since i have been working out and have been blessed with a little muscle and my natural good looks and my debonair swagger, i kinda know how it feels to be looked at...lol And i can tell you, i dont mind it, heck thats why i wear form fitting shirts, so i can feel good about myself, and girls looking at me kinda make me feel good. So when girls say they wear revealing or form fitting clothes to feel good or sexy, not so that guys can look. I ask them, "if no guy looks at them, would they still think they are sexy?" Humans want attention, we LOVE it! but our natural hypocritic nature forces us to deny this want. Girls are no different, heck they are the prime example. And Best believe if it is out, guys will look. Is someone still beautiful if no one thinks they are?
So wetin una think?