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Thursday, March 4, 2010

Would you?


So I woke up early this morning, at 7. I normally wake up at 10:30 on Tuesdays and Thursdays and every other day it will be a surprise if I wake up before 1:30 pm… leaving the life…lol Anyways what else can I do this morning but type a blog???? Nothing

I have been having this convo with my Christian friends, it has been very interesting. I asked if your child is gay and wants to get married, would you be at the wedding? Yea you can imagine the reactions. I personally said I would be at the wedding front and center. It felt weird because all the guys said they would not and the girls said they would, that left me in the too familiar position on being on the “feminine” side of an argument…lol My personal take on it is almost like my take for homosexuality. People spend their whole life trying to be happy, if my child has found happiness in a same sex partner, I will be very happy for him. I have seen and heard how much people will do just to be happy, I’ll be damned if I deny my child that. Yea its against my religion and whatnot, but I think everything in life including religion should be a tool for the individual to achieve happiness, if your religion is not aiding you in happiness, you might want to change it. I believe in doing whatever you feel makes you happy and whatever you feel makes you more of yourself as long as you don’t hurt anyone. Anyways I just want to hear y’alls opinions.

47 comments:

Anonymous said...

lovely post.

When you drill down further, you have to ask base quetions like, what makes one happy? Do we get to choose what makes us happy? When what makes you happy conflicts with that of your kids, what gives? Their happiness or yours? Which is more valuable? Who must sacrifice happiness and under what circumstances?

Where does one draw the line? If sexual relations with beasts makes your kid happy, are you automatically on board? Would you think that's wrong? Does it matter that he didn't choose to be that way? Would you rob him of that happiness?

Life is like an exam essay question about what makes you happy. Society tries to muscle it into multiple choice format with its choice-list of "acceptable" options. Often, your answer is not listed and everyone frowns at you for ignoring the options and writing it in.

LucidLilith said...

Yes. You should love your children unconditionally. Unless of course they turn out to be rapists or murderers.

2cute4u said...

Totally agree with you this time, all the way for once!Lol at the time you get up, you're really living da life!
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The Messiah said...

If your child is old enough to marry then let them choose who they want. Even if you aren't a homosexual supporter you should still support your child for who they are and help make them better. You have to understand as a parent your kids look up to you, and if you disconnect from them you not only did that permanently but you may have created a monster by doing so.

leggy said...

nice post. i would oh.very much so.
i personally think that noone wakes up from sleep and goes like 'my life is going too well, let me become a gay guy so that people will discriminate against me'.
so i think that gayness is not a choice...so if my son turns out to be gay..you sure bet ill be there dancing on his wedding.

leggy said...

day*

TayneMent said...

yes i would go

Realist said...

@Anonymous. If my kid thinks beastiality makes him/her happy... umm wow, that is too much, i havent had time to think about it. Following my normal trend of thought i would say Yes, but dang! what did the goat do yo my child that he/she should punish the goat so?lol

I like your life is like an essay exam quote. Perfect, it is an essay test and we often turn it into a 2 option multiple choice question. "right or wrong"

@2cute4u... lol it is the life.

lahlah said...

i would be very sad, but i would definately attend the wedding and love my child to the best of my ability, i mean you can't throw the child away. "mama bon monkey e still like am", as far is this happiness is not causing harm then were fine, on beastiality, that indeed causes harm (cough origin of AIDS), that's just nasty, and therefore, psych ward awaits the child

lahlah said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chuk said...

nice post but i have a few concerns..Christianity is no religion..its in a class of it own..as a Christian you should not only believe but also KNOW AND ACKNOWLEDGE that JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY..i dont mean to break people's hearts or to hurt anyone feelings..also, God made it clear the hearts of men are deceivng and wicked..we are to lead and guide our heart more than we r to follow it..being a Christian is a full surrender to Christ..homosexuality is not of God..he made marriage to be between opposite genders..also a Christian should love being a Christian

Realist said...

@CHuk
Umm...ok thats besides the point
I am a christian but i dont believe in imposing my view on others.

Fragilelooks said...

DON'T KNOW WOT I'L DO IF THAT HAPPENS.. . . . DON'T KNOW AT ALL.

Azazel said...

Lol @ Chuk...
They asked u simple question of whether u would attend ur child's wedding. Yes or No..
u launched into preaching..

As for me I would attend my child's wedding, whether he be gay or straight.

El-Divine said...

Last time I checked this comment box said "make una talk tru!" I know some of you are being honest when u say you'll all b there dancin and makin merry. but some of u sayin it cos its on a blogpost and you cn say "hell yea!" and forget abt it. If u truly will b proud of urs child havin same sex marriage, how many of u will raise a child tellin him "dont mind that im male ur mum is female or vice versa" but its cool if you marry somoene of the same sex . did i hear someone say he would?? Well goodluck there!
FOR ME and pls, be aware of the FOR ME, theres EVERYTHING fundamentally wrong with same sex marriage. Im not gonna raise my child to see it as normal, and if due to society's influence he grows up seein it as ok..and more, thinks he/she wants to get into it, he/she shouldnt even bother inviting me cos I WILL NOT BE THERE. Goodluck, congratulations, hope the fellow makes u happy...TAKE UR CARD WITH YOU AS YOU LEAVE!!!!

Chuk said...

@ Azazel..that is a very tough question..i am actually still deliberating on it and that is why i didnt answer it da first time..i honestly would honor the marriage and would refuse to recognize the couple as married..nevertheless, i would continue to shoe them love..I WILL NEVER EVER FORSAKE MY CHILD..love is unconditional..i would also continue to pray for them..i probably wouldnt want 2 attend the marriage because i wouldnt recognize it as a wedding and i wouldnt want my child thinking that I am happy with their choice..
@ Realist..ive actually heard what u sid about not imposing our views on others..u can not and shouldnt impose Christianity or force anyone to serve God..that itself is not of God..we should leave them until they choose to submit to Christ..God wants us to serve Him because we want to and not to serve Him dutiful as if its a chore..our wanting to worship makes worship all the more beautiful..on the other hand, that shouldnt stop us from spreading the Good News and drawing others to Christ

Suru said...

I know I will support my child because of my view on gay marriage but I hope I don't even have to experience that in the first place and have healthy straight children lol

KidKaimera said...

I would love my kids regardless of what they were... Honestly, I hate how Christianity is portrayed as a religion that hates people who were considered "despicable" at the time of the Bible's writing... It kills me... I'm sure God would love the way I've lived my life, if not, well, I guess i'm shit outta luck!!!! But I digress, I would love my kids, and watch them get married, hell! I'd walk my boy/girl down the aisle, if I must!

Chuk said...

@ KidKaimera..i understand the support u have for ur children but u have to understand that we we want and like isnt always good for us..God loves everyone regardless of race, sex, sexual orientation, etc but at the same time he wants us to live He has called us to live and to follow His Word

JuaNita said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JuaNita said...

Sure I'll go..so far as as I can "take away" the food. Yeah..I'll go.

Cassandra said...

Wow El Divine am pretty sure that there were some things ur parents raised u to believe that u still do not follow till this day... Have ur parents abandoned u? Bro ur comment is so closeminded and bigotted it's disgusting.

So basically Chuk u would miss the happiest moment in your child's life because u wouldn't want people thinking u supported the marriage?? Nice to see where ur priority is

Azazel said...

Yo Chuk and Eke the reply by cassie is actually by me, she was logged in by mistake and I did not know.

Anywayz Suru incase u did not know it is possible to have perfectly healthy gay children.

Lol Juanita

Kid u are a better person jare.

Chuk ur reply to Kid makes no sense, are u saying he/she should not attend the wedding?? Speak with clarity abeg

Suru said...

Azazel I didn't mean gay people aren't healthy I meant if I had to choose I would prefer a straight and healthy child but I would still love and support my child whatever the case might be.

Myne Whitman said...

Sure I'll go. And exactly for the same reasons. Religion was made for man and not vice versa. I'll leave the judgement up to his/her conscience and God.

Realist said...

At first i used to be all upset at my friends that said they wouldnt go, but then i thought about it, The child will be an adult by then. As a parent should respect the childs decision and right to do what makes him/her happy. The child should also respect the parent enough to understand that the parent going to his/her wedding might just be too much against their beliefs. There comes a point where the parent does not have to sacrifice their happiness. As long as the parent doesnt disown the child i would be ok with that, but it will still cause some friction between them though. As for me I will be there. I will raise my kid as a christian but will always want him/her to make up his own mind about it. I will always stress having his/her own mind.

NenyeN said...

No. I would not.

Azazel said...

Myne ur comment is the sanest I've seen so far.. Makes totaly sense...

Suru I got u

Lol @ Nenye..
Why would u not?

Realist it will cause hella friction o, how would u be able to face ur son and vice versa knowing that ur father/mother had missed out on the biggest event in your life.

Chuk said...

@ Myne Whitman..Christianity is not a religion..
and lemme stop beating around the bush..i wouldnt go

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NenyeN said...

I simply do not recognize same sex marriage as a legitimate institution. I won't disown my child though... I just won't attend the ceremony, and I won't recognize his/her marriage.

Chuk said...

@ NenyeN..thank u so much..u hit the nail right on the head..i couldnt agree with u anymore

Anonymous said...

Attendance.

Anonymous cool.
Lucid cool
2cute4u cool
Messiah cool
Leggy cool
Tayne cool
Realist cool
lahlah cool
Chuk bigot
Fragilelooks potential bigot
Azazel cool
Eldivine bigot
suru closet bigot?
Kidkameira cool
Cassandra cool
Myne cool
Nenye bigot

enziga said...

Lol @ anonymous

Chuk said...

lol Anonymous..its a good thing u decided to stay that way lol jk..but btw, i am not inconsiderate of other's feelings, beliefs, ways, opinions, views, etc..in fact, if u know me..i am it's opposite..but we were all made by God whether we admit it or not..there is only one true God..He made the world and all that is in it..He created us for a reason..He didnt create Adam and Al..its Adam and Eve He created and for a particular reason..there is a reason our bodies arent configured for same-sex reproduction.me being born with a desire and inclination to steal doesnt justify it and make it right

NenyeN said...

Anonymous, great job at defamation of character. You deserve an award. Seriously though, to call me a bigot, would be the same as calling yourself one, because the use of bigot is an example of your own intolerance of my own opinion (which differs from yours). Also, I doubt you know me well enough to make such a statement, and in fact, you making such a statement is indeed a declaration to me that you do not know me at all.

So, try again.

Original Mgbeke said...

Yes, I would. He/She is my child after all...

El-Divine said...

Eche: "eldivine, your comment is so closeminded and bigotted its disgusting".
What was my comment? THAT I WILL NOT GO TO MY CHILDS SAME SEX MARRIAGE, not so? if you think it disgusting, dont I then have the right to assume you did not want an honest answer but for your own ideas of "open mindedness" to be reinforced. Last time i checked, open mindedness also means you have a responsiblity to respect other peoples honest views especially when you demand it urself. So pls, i object to ur terming my views as "disgusting".
Besides that, what is disgusting about the fact that I would refuse to attend his/her wedding? The child would be an adult, I dint say i will forbid him from doing it, neither did i say i will disown him. I only said I will not go, because what makes him happy goes against my own principles, and as two adults, none of us can hold the other to ransom. Therefore, I will wish him well but decline the invitation. That is the honest and principled thing to do, and if I raised such a child, he/she will appreciate that action. And pls, if you are not prepared to accept ppls honest opinions, stop askin for it. Im as free to be disgusted with your stand as you claim to be with mine. Only respect and principle stop me from making such declarations.

El-Divine said...

and about your statement that there are some things my parents told me not to do and still i do them...have they abandoned me??
oh no theyve not. neither did i say i will abandon my child whover they marry. i just wont go to the wedding, period.
i smoke, but i try as much as possible to keep the packs out of sight when im at home...even as an adult. i dont ask my dad to get me a pack on his way home.
i hv sex, but when my dads there i maintain appearances not bcos he doesnt know but cos it goes agaisnt what he tot me. i keep it out of his sight cos as much as i want him to respect my choices, i fuckin respect his too!
so tomorrow if i decide to have a groupie at home, i will invite my dad cos he should be openminded enuf to understand that its what makes me happy?! thats some bullshit reasoning, and coming from you eche, its sinful!

Azazel said...

lOl u object to my terming your views 'disgusting'..
What should I term them as?? Glorious? Lmao

@ . Last time i checked, open mindedness also means you have a responsiblity to respect other peoples honest views especially when you demand it urself. So pls, i object to ur terming my views as "disgusting".

@ i will invite my dad cos he should be openminded enuf to understand that its what makes me happy?! thats some bullshit reasoning, and coming from you eche, its sinful!

So u equate going to a gay wedding as the same thing as having groupie sex?? And u call my reasoning bullshit? Ha bros u are on a long thing.

El Divine it seems like u still do not know me, I have never demanded the respect of my views and neither have I deemed it necessary to respect the views of anybody or any person. I will however, respect the 'holder' of such views but the views themselves might not be worthy of my respect. Please always bear this in mind, u are ENTITLED to hold an OPINION but your OPINION is not ENTITLED to my respect. Always remember that.

Realist said...

Chuk... Christianity is a religion. No need for verbal gymnastic, it is what it is.

Chuk said...

lol i am not a man of fancy and impressing words..no need for 'verbal gymnastic' either lol..u will see one day y it is no religion..being religious doesnt get u 2 Heaven..its ur personal relationship with God..the world classifies it as a religion but is is not..are u Christian, Realist?

Realist said...

Christianity is a religion. Your personal relationship with God is just that, a personal relationship. By definition Christianity is a religion. Chuks i believe Jesus died for my sins and was resurrected on the third day

El-Divine said...

@ so you equate gay marriage with groupie sex.
if you mean by equating them i consider them equal in moral baselessness, then no, i dont. compared to gay marriage, groupie sex is saintly.
the only reason i mentioned groupie is to give an instance of a sexual orientation that i will subscribe to as my source of happiness. My point is this:my father is not obligated to approve my every orientation and choice so that he will prtect my happiness. he has raised me to function independently from him so i no longer need him to guarantee my happiness, if not whats the point of being an adult. If i make choices he likes, then its a bonus, if I make ones he disagrees with, well, too bad. In the same way, after raising a child to adulthood, he can do whatever the fuck he wants , with or without my approval. Thats why hes grown. If you cant understand that then i guess i overestimated your rationality because right now, ur being as emotional abt ur liberality as others are abt their religion.

Azazel said...

True that @ ur father is not obligated to approve of ur every belief..

Chuk said...

@ Realist..religion is man's way to try to reach God..its man made with all sorts of laws and what not..Christianity is God's way of connecting th humanity thru Jesus Christ..

oroque said...

how did "to go or not to go" turn into respect for view holder but not for views? ... how typical of nigerians to so quickly let ego get in the way of an interestingly biased and opinionated argument.